I laughed first - then cried.
You could go to any country on the planet and interview people - then choose
the dumb ones for the film. The Americans on this vid are really pathetic.
Here's a funny to cheer you up.
How To Give A Cat A Pill 1. Pick up cat and cradle it in the crook of your left arm as if holding
a baby. Position right forefinger and thumb on either side of cat's
mouth and gently apply pressure to cheeks while holding pill in right
hand. As the cat opens mouth, pop pill into its mouth. Allow cat to
close mouth and swallow
2. Retrieve pill from floor and cat from behind sofa. Cradle cat in left
arm and repeat process
3. Retrieve cat from bedroom, and throw soggy pill away.
4. Take new pill from foil wrap, cradle cat in left arm, holding rear
paws tightly with left hand. Force jaws open and push pill to back of
mouth with right forefinger. Hold mouth shut for a count of ten.
5. Retrieve pill from goldfish bowl and cat from top of wardrobe. Call
spouse in from the yard.
6. Kneel on floor with cat wedged firmly between knees, hold front
and rear paws. Ignore low growls emitted by cat. Get spouse to hold
head firmly with one hand while forcing wooden ruler into mouth.
Drop pill down ruler and rub cat's throat vigorously.
7. Retrieve cat from curtain rod, get another pill from foil wrap.
Make note to buy new ruler and repair curtains. Carefully sweep
shattered figurines and vases from hearth and set to one side for
gluing later.
8. Wrap cat in large towel and get spouse to lie on cat with head
just visible from below armpit. Put pill in end of drinking straw,
force mouth open with pencil and blow down drinking straw.
9. Check label to make sure pill not harmful to humans, drink 1 beer
to take taste away. Apply Band-Aid to spouse's forearm and
remove blood from carpet with cold water and soap.
10. Retrieve cat from neighbor's garage. Get another pill. Open
another beer. Place cat in cupboard, and close door onto it's neck,
to leave head showing. Force mouth open with dessert spoon. Flick
pill down throat with elastic band.
11. Fetch screwdriver from garage and put cupboard door back on
hinges. Drink beer. Fetch bottle of scotch. Pour shot, drink. Apply
cold compress to cheek and check records for date of last tetanus
shot. Apply whiskey compress to cheek to disinfect. Toss back
another shot. Throw tee shirt away and fetch new one from
bedroom.
12. Call fire department to retrieve the damn cat from the 40 foot
pine tree across the road.
13. Apologize to neighbor who crashed into fence while swerving to
avoid cat. Take last pill from foil wrap.
13. Tie the little bastard's front paws to rear paws with garden
twine and bind tightly to leg of dining table, find heavy-duty pruning
gloves from garage. Push pill into mouth followed by large piece of
steak.
Be rough about it. Hold head vertically and pour 2 pints of water
down throat to wash pill down.
14. Consume remainder of scotch. Get spouse to drive you to the
emergency room, sit quietly while doctor stitches fingers and
forearm and removes pill remnants from right eye. Call furniture
shop on way home to order new table.
15. Arrange for SPCA to collect mutant cat from hell and call local pet
shop to see if they have any hamsters.
How To Give A Dog A Pill 1. Wrap it in bacon.
2. Toss it in the air.